Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Conversations With a 5 Year Old

My friend Viv is a great blogger. She's always writing about her conversations with her daughter Kerri. It's always interesting to me that Kerri & Erin seem to have the same things on their minds at the same time. Even though they're 2 years apart in age!
In the last few months, I've been starting the conversation that her Bubbe Nancy is not my mother. She has a real hard time with that since she knows that a bubbe is a grandma which means the parent of a parent. I've started telling her some things about her Grandma Enid who was my mother. I've been discussing the fact that she is named for her Grandma Enid.
Not long ago, Erin asked me where her Grandma Enid was. I had to explain that my mother had died a long time before Erin was born. This is a topic that has been getting a lot of attention lately. My dad & stepmother had to put their dog Henry down this year. Since Erin always asks to hear Henry bark over the phone, I had to tell her that Henry had gone to sleep. It was a fairly easy conversation since our fish Dory had died also. (BTW, I don't think she really understood that until the Henry talk.) We've also had to go to my grandfather's condo to meet my brother & his wife while they were taking care of things. Erin wanted to know where we were going & why. I told her we were going to Great-Grandpa Harry's old house. Uh, where is he momma? I explained that Great-Grandpa Harry had died when she was just a little baby.
Next I had to explain that Grandma Enid, Great-Grandpa Harry, Dory the Fish & Henry the Dog were all in heaven with G-d. Uh oh! Next conversation!
Thunder & lightening are recent problems for Erin. She has started to be upset by the noise & light flashes. I have done my best to explain that when it thunders, G-d is bowling, & when it's lightening, G-d has gotten a strike. This week, G-d is spending a lot of time at the bowling alley!
Now Erin wants to know if Grandma Enid & Great-Grandpa Harry are bowling too! And do they play with Dory the Fish & Henry the Dog.


Vivian M said...

Awwww...I can totally understand Erin's reasoning, and of course they are all in heaven bowling together!
Kerri had to deal with the heaven talks very early on when we lost Charlie and then Grandma Donna. I am not sure how much she really understands, but am glad we can talk about it.
Hang in there, at least Erin isn't growing babies in a garden!

Sandra said...

I know that this is so hard for our kids....They'll get it eventually!

Michelle said...

Hey, my grandpa is in heaven playing cards and having a rip roaring good time. Tommy is watching all his favorite movies and being able to to do all the things he couldn't on earth...If Erin wants to believe that heaven is a bowling problem for me!

I personally believe heaven is peanut butter and chocolate!

Magi said...

I guess we have a few years to plan how we're going to handle the tough conversations. Until then, I'll take notes from the rest of you.